Friday, February 15, 2013

The 100 Greatest Movie Quotes of All Time (That You May Have Forgotten About)

I'm sure you're all sick of seeing list upon list of the greatest movie quotes where the top 10 quotes almost seem duplicated. You can almost count on the inclusion of "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn" and almost every second line of Casablanca. Many of the quotes on these lists are iconic, but classic status does not equate to being fresh, and a quote like "Go ahead, make my day" has lost its zing because of parody and overuse. Don't fret. I am here to offer you 100 movie quotes that you may never have heard before, or quotes that don't receive the recognition they deserve. As I'm trying to avoid "the usual" great movie quotes, none of the quotes on this list appear on AFI's 100 Years...100 Movie Quotes list.

100. "Redrum!" - Danny Torrance, The Shining 

99. "This one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy." - Michelle Flaherty, American Pie 

98. "I fucking hate Goldfrapp." - Hayley Stark, Hard Candy 

97. "Get off my lawn!" - Walt Kowalski, Gran Torino 

96. "I do a great impression of a hot dog." - Daniel Hillard, Mrs. Doubtfire 

95. "Fidelio." - Dr. Bill Harford, Eyes Wide Shut

94. "You guys on MySpace, or...?" - Francis the Driver, Superbad

93. "You are home." - Penny Lane, Almost Famous 

92. "I'm an excellent driver." - Raymond Babbitt, Rain Man

91. "Fuller! Go easy on the Pepsi!" - Leslie McCallister, Home Alone

90. “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.” - Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

89. "Welcome to prime time, bitch!" - Freddy Krueger, A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors 

88. "I love my dead gay son." - Kurt's Dad, Heathers 

87. "Come play with us, Danny." - Grady Twins, The Shining 

86. "I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?" - Jack Byrnes, Meet the Parents 

85. "Do you have a favourite-sounding word? My top-five are ointment, bumblebee, Vladivostok, banana, and testicle." - Max, Mary and Max 

84. If you think about it: your favorite memories, the most important moments in your life...were you alone?” - Ryan Bingham, Up in the Air 

83. "Bless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen." - Kevin McCallister, Home Alone 

82. "What an excellent day for an exorcism." - Pazuzu, The Exorcist

81. "Welcome to the island of misfit toys." - Sam, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

80. “Nobody feels like an adult. It’s the world’s dirty secret.” - Peter Hoberg, Liberal Arts

79. "Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?" - John Bender, The Breakfast Club

78. "You know, gingivitis is the number one cause of all tooth decay." - Ace Ventura, Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls 

77. "Mr. McCallister, here's your very own cheese pizza." - Cedric the Bellman, Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

76. "You're gonna die up there." - Regan MacNeil, The Exorcist 

75. "I'm not obsessing. I'm just curious." - Ricky Fitts, American Beauty

74. "No one ever takes a photograph of something they want to forget." - Sy Parrish, One Hour Photo

73. "You still wake up sometimes, don't you? You wake up in the dark and hear the screaming of the lambs." - Hannibal Lecter, The Silence of the Lambs  

72. “My fucking wife has an ass in her cock in the drive way, alright? I'm sorry if my thoughts are not on the photography of the film we're shooting tomorrow." - Little Bill, Boogie Nights 

71. “And I'm not going to stand here and see that thing cut open and see that little Kintner boy spill out all over the dock!” - Mayor Vaughn, Jaws 

70. "You know everything is not an anecdote. You have to discriminate. You choose things that are funny or mildly amusing or interesting. You're a miracle! Your stories have NONE of that. They're not even amusing accidentally!" - Neal Page, Planes, Trains & Automobiles 

69. "Look at me, Damien! It's all for you." - Nanny, The Omen (1976)

68. "Amélie still seeks solitude. She amuses herself with silly questions about the world below, such as 'How many people are having an orgasm right now?'" - Narrator, Amelie 

67. "You don't make up for your sins in church. You do it in the streets. You do it at home. The rest is bullshit and you know it." - Martin Scorsese (narrating), Mean Streets 

66. "I came." - Billy Maplewood, Happiness 

65. "Sometimes when I'm sad, I sit and watch the power station. They say if you lie between two of the main wires, your body just evaporates. You become a gas. I wonder what that would feel like." - Tammy Metzler, Election  

64. “Mo cuishle means 'My darling. My blood.'" - Frankie Dunn, Million Dollar Baby 

63. "I brought you flours." - Harold Crick, Stranger Than Fiction 

62. "I think you're the opposite of a paranoid. I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you." - Harry Block, Deconstructing Harry 

61. "His name is Robert Paulson." - Members of Fight Club (chanting), Fight Club

60. "Our lives are defined by opportunities, even the ones we miss." - Benjamin Button, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button 

59. "The man who said 'I'd rather be lucky than good' saw deeply into life. People are afraid to face how great a part of life is dependent on luck." - Chris Wilton, Match Point 

58. "You use sex to express every emotion except love." - Judy, Husbands and Wives 

57. "What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down." - George Bailey, It's a Wonderful Life

56. "Bullshit. I bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose." - Gunnery Sergeant Hartman, Full Metal Jacket

55. "We hope or despair because of the way we've been programmed. Genes and randomness, that's all there is and none of it matters." - Mark Wiener, Palindromes 

54. “Hey, my girlfriend is dead, you know? She fell off a cliff and died on impact.” - Happy Gilmore, Happy Gilmore 

53. "I hate coconut. Not the taste, consistency." - Tallahassee, Zombieland 

52. "Remember those posters that said, 'Today is the first day of the rest of your life'? Well, that's true with every day except one—the day you die." - Lester Burnham, American Beauty 

51. "There's a confidence in you guys that's horrifying. You're all ADD and carpal tunnel. You wouldn't know agoraphobia if it bit you in the ass, and it makes you mean." - Roger Greenberg, Greenberg 

50. "Every night it's the fucking chicken! Holy God Almighty! Is it possible just once we could get something to eat for dinner around here that's not the goddamned fucking chicken?" - Grandpa Edwin Hoover, Little Miss Sunshine 

49. "Respect the cock! And tame the cunt!" - Frank T.J. Mackey, Magnolia

48. "I don't give a crap if you covered yourself in peanut butter and had a 15-hooker gang bang!" - Adam, Saw

47. "I’ll poop into her butthole, and then she’ll poop it back, into my butthole. And then we’ll just keep doing it, back and forth, with the same poop." - Robby, Me and You and Everyone We Know

46. "Anything is possible. It is night on planet earth and I'm alive. And someday I'll be dead. Someday I'll just be bones in a box, but right now, I'm not. And anything is possible." - Jeff, SubUrbia 

45. "Alright, alright, Mickey's a mouse, Donald's a duck, Pluto's a dog. What's Goofy?" - Gordie, Stand By Me

44. "A gun rack...a gun rack. I don't even own a gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack." - Wayne Campbell, Wayne's World 

43. "Boys have a penis. Girls have a vagina." - Joseph, Kindergarten Cop 

42. "If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis." - Old Farm Lady, Billy Madison

41. "Have you ever seen a human heart? It looks like a fist, wrapped in blood! Go fuck yourself! You writer! You liar!" - Larry, Closer 

40. "I'm taking a remedial high school art class for fuck-ups and retards." - Enid, Ghost World  

39. "Dear Lord, thank you for this Thanksgiving holiday. And for all the material possessions we have and enjoy. And for letting us white people kill all the Indians and steal their tribal lands. And stuff ourselves like pigs, even though children in Asia are being napalmed." - Wendy Hood, The Ice Storm

38. "Kill everyone now! Condone first degree murder! Advocate cannibalism! Eat shit! Filth is my politics! Filth is my life!" - Babs Johnson, Pink Flamingos  

37. "Could you describe the ruckus, sir?" - Brian Johnson, The Breakfast Club

36. "You are probably going to be a very successful computer person. But you're going to go through life thinking that girls don't like you because you're a nerd. And I want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, that that won't be true. It'll be because you're an asshole." - Erica Albright, The Social Network 

35. "I have to return some videotapes." - Patrick Bateman, American Psycho

34. “One through nine, no maybes, no supposes, no fractions. You can't travel in space, you can't go out into space, you know, without, like, you know, uh, with fractions—what are you going to land on—one-quarter, three-eighths? What are you going to do when you go from here to Venus or something? That's dialectic physics.” - Photojournalist, Apocalypse Now

33. "Maybe the poets are right. Maybe love is the only answer." - Mickey, Hannah and Her Sisters 

32. "How art thou, thou globby bottle of cheap, stinking chip oil? Come and get one in the yarbles, if ya have any yarbles, you eunuch jelly thou!" - Alex DeLarge, A Clockwork Orange

31. "Back, and to the left." - Jim Garrison, JFK 

30. "I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in braille. I used to rub the dirty parts. - Fielding Mellish, Bananas 

29. "Put that coffee down. Coffee's for closers only." - Blake, Glengarry Glen Ross

28. "I'm gonna go get the papers, get the papers." - Jimmy Two Times, Goodfellas

27. "Become vengeance, David. Become wrath." - John Doe, Se7en

26. "I...drink...your...milkshake! I drink it up!" - Daniel Plainview, There Will Be Blood 

25. “We've become a race of Peeping Toms. What people ought to do is get outside their own house and look in for a change.” - Stella, Rear Window 

24. "See, the sad thing about a guy like you is, in 50 years you're gonna start doin' some thinkin' on your own and you're going to come up with the fact that there are two certainties in life: one, don't do that, and two, you dropped 150 grand on a fuckin' education you could have got for a dollar fifty in late charges at the public library!" - Will, Good Will Hunting 

23. "The more they tried to make it just like home, the more they made everybody miss it." - Willard, Apocalypse Now

22. "Are the daughter's miseries the mother's triumphs?" - Eva, Autumn Sonata 

21. "I'm into leather." - Alvy's Classmate, Annie Hall

20. "Why not? Life is short. Life is dull. Life is full of pain. And this is a chance for something special." - Juan Antonio, Vicky Cristina Barcelona  

19. "Always fast food. Fast food. Things that people would rather throw out than finish. It's easy, it tastes alright, but it doesn't really provide you any nourishment. I'm fast food." - Dave Spritz, The Weather Man

18. “We're all just complicated arrangements of atoms and subatomic particles—we don't live.” - The Scientist, Bad Boy Bubby 

17. “Not everybody gets corrupted. You have to have a little faith in people." - Tracy, Manhattan 

16. "What came first: the music or the misery?" - Rob, High Fidelity 

15. "I was 12 going on 13 the first time I saw a dead human being." - The Writer, Stand By Me

14. "These walls are funny. First you hate 'em, then you get used to 'em. Enough time passes, you get so you depend on them. That's institutionalised." - Red, The Shawshank Redemption 

13. "Nostalgia is denial—denial of the painful present." - Paul, Midnight in Paris

12. “Only one is a wanderer; two together are always going somewhere.” - Madeleine, Vertigo

11. "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." - Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off

10. "Honey, you're the one who stopped sleeping with me, OK. It'll be a year come April 20th. I remember the date exactly, because it was Hitler's birthday." - Cliff Stern, Crimes and Misdemeanors 

9. "The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist." - Verbal Kint, The Usual Suspects 

8. "I want knowledge! Not faith, not assumptions, but knowledge. I want God to stretch out His hand, uncover His face and speak to me." - Antonius Block, The Seventh Seal 

7. "A relationship, I think, is like a shark. You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark." - Alvy Singer, Annie Hall 

6. "Our knowledge has made us cynical; our cleverness, hard and unkind. We think too much and feel too little." - A Jewish Barber, The Great Dictator 

5. “No hay banda! There is no band! Il n'est pas de orquestra! This is all a tape-recording. No hay banda! And yet we hear a band.” - Bondar, Mulholland Dr.

4. "Books, records, films—these things matter. Call me shallow but it's the fuckin' truth." - Rob, High Fidelity 

3. "Let's never come here again because it would never be as much fun. - Charlotte, Lost in Translation 

2. "That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call 'em something else." - Jim Baker, Sixteen Candles 

1. "I believe so strongly in mayonnaise." - Elmo Oxygen, Schizopolis